Sameer Chandra

Posts Tagged ‘dear one’


RIP, Dr. Ramesh Srivastava

In Life or Something Like It on January 19, 2015 at 4:25 pm

Yesterday was a tough, long day. Saying goodbye to a loved one is hard. Saying final goodbye to one of the kindest, accomplished, yet very humble individual was one of the hardest things I’ve even done. Dr. Ramesh Kumar Srivastava was the first plastic surgeon in Athens, Georgia, and the only plastic surgeon in our family, full of medical doctors. Just glancing at the gathering at his funeral, you could get a sense of what he has accomplished in his lifetime.

People flew in from multiple states to pay their last respects on a cold, windy, winter morning. Not a single pair of eyes was dry. None seemed too eager to leave afterwards. Walking by groups of strangers, I overheard so many conversations centered around Masaji. Few reminisced of their travels together, about far away places, some talked about their surgical experiences, and you could see the smile that brought to their faces. A true evidence of a life well lived.

“Masaji” as we lovingly called him, was one of the very few individuals who’ve always treated me with respect (whether I deserved it or not). We shared common interests in photography, and gardening. I never missed an opportunity to learn from our conversations, however brief they may have been. He enlightened us with his experiences of traveling the world, his life experiences, living in India, Canada, New York, Ohio and Athens with his life partner of 49 years, 11 months…Meena “Masi.”

In response to Masaji’s passing, she said “that it is an end of a glorious, and wonderful journey, with a man whom she loved, respected, and will always be proud to call her husband”. I’m sorry; that life is often unjust, and so cruel that it couldn’t even offer them another month of togetherness to celebrate a milestone, 50 years of married life.

Masi means “mother like” in Hindi, and she lives up to, and often goes above and beyond that role. She does so much for everyone who comes in contact with her. She has touched countless number of people in her lifetime, with her generosity, love and kindness and continues to do so, even when she is limited by an aging body. Her body may be getting weaker; her spirit soars as ever.

“It is not our job to toughen our children up to face a cruel and heartless world. It is our job to raise children who will make the world a little less cruel and heartless (R. Knost)”. True to the saying, what a splendid job Ramesh Masaji and Meena Masi has done in raising Amitabh Srivastava and Anurag Srivastava we lovingly call “lovey” and “joey” dada, respectively.

We mourn Ramesh Masaji’s passing, but more so, we celebrate his life.

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Age is nothing but a number!

In Uncategorized on March 26, 2012 at 3:46 pm

How old would you feel, if you didn’t know your real age? Whatever that number is, what’s stopping you from feeling that way, now?

I’ve pondered over this question for about a week. What triggered me to think along these lines, is a personal situation in the family, where a very close dear one is struggling to find the meaning of life, and strength to fight, what’s potentially hanging over the horizon, a life-threatening diagnosis.

In short twelve weeks, I’ve seen the cheery, effervescent qualities being replaced by weariness, and doubt along with her declining health. As she prepares herself for harder times ahead, she’s struggling to understand, “why me?”

It’s a question with no obvious answer. The truth is, it is never about “Why Me?” The situation we happen to be in, influences in conjuring an answer, we eventually convince ourselves that somehow we deserved to be in that situation.

The more important, but often the neglected question is “What Now?” The sooner one comes to terms with the situation, the sooner they can start looking for solutions. Often, the answers to what now are shaped by our attitude towards life. Some people live their age, some live to age, some age to live, some others are ageless, while others don’t even know the difference.

I read somewhere that “Life by itself is a terminal disease.” We all will eventually fade away, in our own time. People remember us for what we do from the moment we’re born to the moment we die. It is never about the origin or the end, but the journey that adds meaning to life.

I can’t say, that I have done enough in my life, to make people remember me for who I am. But, that’s on a larger scale. On a much smaller, personal level, I’m at peace, with who I am, and what I want from my life.

I’m in my early 40s. That number though finite, has infinite meanings. It is meaningless to a toddler, Old for a teenager, an “age of wisdom” for my subordinates, “just life” for my peers, “youth” for my elders, and yet we struggle everyday to understand this basic fact; age is nothing but a number.

Then why fight it, why worry about it? Often, people rely on the age-old cliché “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade”. At any given instance, we always have at the minimum, two choices. What you do with the lemons is your call.

Life gives us lemons because it doesn’t know any better. The truth is, you can’t drink lemonade for the rest of your life no matter how long or short it is.

Think about the following; the answers may set you free;
1. Why are you, you?
2. If not now, then, when?
3. What is the difference between “being alive” and “living” for you? And what’s keeping you from feeling that way?

Life is about living every moment of it, whichever way you choose it to be. How you look at it, will define how it is going to be. I don’t know if I have the answers yet, but I’m on the right path.